Well troops, irrespective of the calendar, it’s now summer in AZ. Search your memory & remember your summertime protocols. Carry water with you! Check your tires: air pressure and tread depth! (2/32” minimum!!!)! Check engine oil AT LEAST once a week! Keep your battery at full charge or consider replacing it, if it’s 2 years old! And so on......

Come by our shop 8139 E Apache Trail #12 in East Mesa on Sunday, May 20th, at 1pm

for our free maintenance class for other tips.

And remember - just ‘cause you’ve got a “guardian angel” bolted to your bike doesn’t mean you

Dear Gypsy, I recently bought a ‘96 Triumph T-bird and I have a different sort of problem: my bike is too loud. I’ve heard “loud pipes save lives” but this is too much! I wear a full helmet and ear plugs when I ride but after a few miles my ears are ringing! I priced a new stock exhaust system from the dealer and they want $1500, if it’s in stock. That’s too much! HELP!! Tinnitus Tommy

Tommy, I checked and you’re right. A stock exhaust IS way too expensive, and the point of most aftermarket exhausts is loud, not quiet. I’m betting you only need mufflers, not the whole exhaust. Check your mufflers and see if the baffles are covered in a fiberglass or steel mesh blanket to help absorb sound. No baffles at all? There are many different types available. Find some with the outside diameter closely matching the inside diameter of your mufflers. Try used mufflers from a scooter salvage yard, but check ‘em carefully. No matter how good the chrome looks, it’s the baffles you want. Finally, if appearance isn’t a big concern, try automotive mufflers. I’ve got a friend who runs “cherry bombs” on his Sportster.............. Gypsy

Hey Gypsy, What is a “Rat Bike” and what is the appeal? Curious George

Geo, Rat bikes come originally from riders who wanted to keep riding even after the money or parts availability dried up. It was a mark of pride to be able to ride a bike that was dependent solely upon the owner’s ability to scrounge a part or adapt something that had absolutely NO business being on a motorcycle. Then some chowderhead decided to build a “fake” rat bike by attaching “found” objects to a perfectly operational bike; to give the appearance of a scooter in rough shape that ran well. JB Weld stock went up. Decals and flat black paint sold quickly. But real riders weren’t fooled. Cowboys used to say, “you can tell a lot about a man from his boots”.

A person’s scoot will tell you about who they are............. Gypsy

A few months back I asked you folks to write in and tell me how to spot a “biker”. The theme that was repeated over and over was: You gotta RIDE your bike! Apparently WHAT you ride isn’t near as important as actually riding (“if you see this motorcycle on a trailer call 911”). Age nor money (or lack thereof) did not factor in. It seems most of you think a biker is a stand-up guy or gal to whom the most important thing in life is riding a motorcycle. And isn’t everything else beside the point? (“I don’t wanna pickle, I just wanna ride my motorsickle....”).

Thanks to all for your insights and keep the letters coming.........

Also, a BIG thanks to the support of everyone who has attended one of our free maintenance classes. Consider this an invitation to all of you great folks out there to come to our next one: Sunday, May 20th @ 1:00 P.M. This time we’ll be discussing YOUR bike and YOUR particular questions so ride on over and join in! Gypsy

P.S. Ladies - we are co-ed ~ so don’t be shy - drop by! ~ Sheri

Dear Gypsy, I recently bought a '93 FLT (rubber mounted engine FLH) and I found that the turn signals don't work.

Will it matter that it only has signals on the rear? Larry Lites

Larry, You didn't give me a lot to work with, but here goes. First thing, yep you need all 4 signals to get it to flash. All H-D's with turn signals were designed to only work with the amperage draw of 4 bulbs. When you hit the button does the signal even light up? If it does, you probably only need a "load equalizer" or 2 more lights added to the system to get 'em to flash. If not, you need to determine if power is getting to the socket and then if the flasher unit is working. See your manual or favorite mech for more details, or call me and I'll try to help you. (Mechanics prior to cell phones used to say "hold it closer to the phone". Now people will e-mail you pictures (usually fuzzy) and figure that's the same as bringing it in....) Gypsy

Dear Gypsy, I recently needed a new rear tire on my "bagger" and started calling various shops to price a stock Dunlop. Most had similar prices so I went "on line" to try to save some money and found one for about $30 less than any local shop. When I took my tire around to have it mounted, 3 of the 4 shops I took it to suddenly increased the mounting price by 2 or 3 times. What's wrong with these pirates? I quickly dropped these thieves from MY list of good shops. Sensible Sally

Dear "don't see the whole picture Sal", When you go out to breakfast, do you bring your own eggs and insist on a price break on your omelet? Most shops buy parts in such small quantities that they offer similar prices to the next shop down the street. "Stores" on the internet (and franchises) can buy in greater quantities and therefore sell 'em to you at a better (cheaper) price. When the little shop buys some parts, such as oil, tires, or certain other petrol-based things, the price varies based on whether or not some oil baron needs to send valentines to all 37 of his wives or only the latest wife. Don't kid yourself, most small businesses are NOT making money "hand over fist". Some, in an effort to discourage just what you've done and encourage you to buy from them, will increase labor rates on parts brought in.

Talk to 'em. See if they'll give you a price break before you write 'em off as "crooks".

But remember, they're running a business, not a garage sale. Gypsy

Well troops, I've been getting some very interesting responses to my question "what is a biker, how can you tell one" and when I get a few more, I'll pass 'em on in a future column. Thanks to everyone. Some of the letters really made me think (ouch!). Also, thanks to all who came to our last free maintenance class. We’re having another one on Sunday March 18th. It’ll start at 1pm. Space is limited, so give us an RSVP at 480-406-8281, 480-440-5468, or ForeverTwoWheels1@gmail.com.

Moving to our new location at 8139 E. Apache Trail, Mesa, AZ 85208

C'ya next month

Dear Gypsy, I want to ride! Every time I turn around I see someone ride past me, just enjoying the heck out of themselves. With the economy the way it is, I can't afford much, but I'm handy and used to build hot rods "back in the day" so I've come up with a plan. I found a "classic" '83 Harley "FLT" basket case for $2000.00. The guy who is selling it said he took it apart to paint it 10 years ago & just never got around to finishing it. I figure another $2000.00 - $3000.00 and a little "sweat equity" and I'm riding. Any hints? Sharp Shane

.......SIGH....... Shane, it ain't that easy. Anything that's been sitting around disassembled for 10 years has lost lots of small - but important - (and probably expensive) pieces. Very few basket cases became such because they needed paint, so figure on once (if ever) assembled, your new project may need serious repairs due to abuse from a prior owner. The odds are against ya, pal, unless your best friend is a professional bike mechanic familiar with your money pit (sorry - I mean project). Then there are "classic" Harleys and others that are classic boat anchors. You need to do your homework and find out if this '83 dreamboat had problems back in '83 and if parts are still available for her. The surest, quickest way to ride is take your two grand and find something in that price range that is running (and licensed) now. It may be smaller and not the nationality you want but it will be more fun to ride than an empty frame sitting on blocks in the garage. Come by the shop & I'll tell you more. Gypsy

Dear Gypsy, Last time I took my bike to the shop, I think I may have paid for parts I didn't receive.

For instance, what is a "derby cover gasket and kicker cover gasket? English Ed

Ed, You've run afoul of jargon. Most of Harleys' production up until 1965 had a tin cover over the clutch mechanism that vaguely resembled a shallow derby hat. Hence "clutch cover" = "derby cover". On the other side of the bike, the transmission side cover, up until about 1982, had the kick-start lever attached to it, so of course it follows "transmission side cover" = "kicker cover". Here's a free one: Harley's first attempt at an EPA compliant air cleaner was called a "bread box"; guess 'cause it was rectangular and about the size of a loaf of bread.

Now what other scooter has such colorful parts? Gypsy

Hey Troops! Got a riddle for ya. What is a biker? See, the question came up when I was in line behind some citizens in the drug store and I overheard one of them refer to me as a "Biker". I wasn't riding that day, I was wearing an unmarked baseball cap, a no-name solid color t-shirt, dirty black jeans and my favorite "Chuck Taylor's". True, I've got a beard and need a haircut, but what marked me as a "biker" to the civilians? How do you know when you see one? Where's the line? How 'bout the guy in the fake "Sons of Malarky" vest? Write and give me your spin on this... (how'd they know I wasn't homeless)? Gypsy Forever Two Wheels 480-406-8281 forevertwowheels1@gmail.com

Willy, No, sealed bearings like on your bike won’t turn very easily; however when installed and torqued correctly they allow the wheel to spin freely. Harleys prior to 2000 used tapered Timken bearings, which turned freely in the box or installed, practically up to the moment of total failure. Since they require occasional service, they were replaced by sealed roller bearings that need much less attention. Don’t sweat it, enjoy your chrome. Gypsy Dear Gypsy, I’ve got a “short” problem. I just bought a ‘05 FLH and I can’t put both feet flat on the ground when I stop at a traffic light. I’m 5’5” and my inseam is 29”. The seat height seems to be about 33”.

Help! I love this bike, but stop lights scare me. Petite Pixie

Pixie I’ve got a “short” fix for you: air shocks. I don’t mean the stock 13 inch long units you probably have now. I’m referring to “aftermarket” shocks intended to lower the rear of your scooter. Some even have on-board compressors so you can raise and lower on the fly (like approaching or leaving a stop light...). The better ones will lower your ride up to 3 inches. Call me for specifics on manufacturers & models. Next, either take your seat to an upholstery shop & have a couple inches of the foam taken out (heck, take it all out and have ‘em put in a 1 inch thick gel-pad...) or buy a new , low-profile seat. If this isn’t enough, the forks can be lowered up to an inch and a half with new springs and oil. Just don’t do as I’ve seen before; add two inch thicker heels and soles to your riding boots. It’s just so tacky.... Gypsy

Dear Frug, How do you know the leak was the primary? What we do around here is wash the suspected leak area completely, ride the bike a few miles, and examine the area. Usually, this gives you a pretty accurate idea of where the leak is. Sometimes you need to wash the whole bike to be sure the leak you find isn’t coming from someplace else and dripping onto the suspect area. Modern gaskets are forgiving and will take more abuse than you suspect. So unless the motorcycle has been sitting for a year or so, or someone has recently “disturbed” the gasket (i.e., removed the cover, etc.) they don’t generally leak for no reason. If someone installed “cheap” gaskets to start with, didn’t torque the part down correctly (think of the “pattern” a valve cover gets tightened down with...) or too tightly, or not tight enough...... Call me and I’ll give you a list of my favorite gasket makers. Just keep in mind the leak MAY be from a completely different place that you don’t want to find later. Gypsy

Dear Gypsy, I have an ‘02 Fat-Boy with stock brakes, wheels & tires. Lately, the brakes don’t seem as firm as they should be. My neighbor looked at them for me and told me I need new brake pads. Since the odometer shows only 23,000 miles, I think I’ve been cheated! Shouldn’t brake pads last longer?

Todd, You haven’t been cheated; let’s examine your situation. Did you buy the bike new? The engineers who designed your brakes would be happy to hear you got that much use from them. Since your scooter has less than half as much braking ability as your car (and MUCH less weight...) comparisons with car systems are sorta “apples & oranges” so don’t go off in that direction. How do you ride - aggressive? Do you use BOTH brakes every time you stop? Let’s examine the parts of your braking system. Is the rotor smooth or flat? Lay a straight edge on the rotor and try to slide an.008” feeler gauge between the rotor & straight edge. No go? Then your disc is serviceable. It goes? Then you’re iffy. Any more & you need a new disc. What do the pads look like? Harley’s service manual says there must be at least .060” thickness. Use a dime as a reference as it’s about .040”, which is what Harley’s test engineers use as an acceptable reference. Are the pads wearing evenly? Are they greasy or shiny (“glazed”)? Toss ‘em & figure out where the grease/oil came from. New pads need to be “bedded” which is a process of gradual, light stops for a few miles (I’d say at least 50). Heat is a major factor in glazing; avoid it. Check your brake fluid; is it grey-ish? Replace it with fresh fluid (not that year-old stuff you’ve got sitting on the shelf - it’s had 360+ days to absorb moisture from the air) as specified by the manual for your bike, which is “DOT 5”. Don’t mix different types of fluid, none of them are compatible! The reaction will cause swelling of rubber parts in the brake system and mushy brakes. Your stock brakes, in correctly functioning form, should be more than a match for any riding you do. Note: NO police bikes use anything other than STOCK brakes, unless the officer puts them on himself (usually because they’re prettier....).

Dear Gypsy, This isn’t really a bike question, more like a “biker” question. I ride a (vehicle i.d. deleted to protect the innocent...) and wave to almost every rider I see, (unless my bluetooth rings, heck, I’m a businessman, I’ve got to conduct business...). I’ve noted most of the fellows (and gals, too, come to think about it) that ride those (vehicle i.d. deleted to avoid hate and discontent...) don’t wave back. Sometimes I’ll see these fellows (or gals) at the tavern and when I question them about it, they become abusive or attempt to strike me (that’s why I have the MCSO phone number on speed dial). What’s wrong with these people? When I bought my (deleted) I was told us bikers stick together. I’ve been riding for 2 years now and it seems like this situation is getting worse! (DELETED) Hal

Seriously Hal? Bluetooth on your bike? Go stand in the corner while I figure out how to answer you! And take the jerks who text and “cell-phone” while driving, with you........ O.K., Hal, come on back (leave those other @#*&%ers in the corner). When you’re riding, that’s all you should be doing. You should be so busy avoiding the 4-wheel idiots and enjoying the scoot that you don’t want or need anything else. You don’t need a stereo blasting or any other distraction to the ride. Sure lots of “bikes” have radio/cd/cb, etc. They are distractions and NOT NEEDED! Unless you don’t care if you have an accident once in a while. Do I need to tell you ALL the bad things? Don’t drink, don’t do drugs, don’t argue with your passenger, don’t pet your dog, don’t rearrange your stuffed animals - NOT while you’re riding!! And Hal, that’s one of the great things about this country, you don’t HAVE to wave or talk to ANYbody you don’t want to. Buying a bike didn’t buy you into a special comradeship. It’s just a vehicle. Riders SHOULD be friendly to each other, but it ain’t a rule. IF you want to make friends at the tavern, buy ‘em a drink, shake their hand, make their acquaintance - without any expectations. That wasn’t in the sales contract.

“We’re starting a new column this issue. It’s “Gypsy’s Corner”, a tech oriented niche for your American V-twin questions. Gypsy has been working on scooters for over 20 years and, along with his wife, the lovely Demented Elf, operates a small motorcycle repair & parts shop in Mesa called “Forever Two Wheels”. Gypsy sez he’s been around long enough to remember when electric starters were an option....

Hey troops, let’s get right into it!

Dear Gypsy, I bought an ‘02 XLH and I’ve had starting problems from the start with this thing! When I brought it home, the next day it wouldn’t start, just made a clicking noise. My friend who has a bike told me I need a battery, so I went to (a famous discount store) & bought a replacement. Two weeks after installing it, same thing, click-click-click, no start. Any ideas? Electric Ed